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Rat



A rat the size of a lorry has invaded my garden shed... ,




















Submited By : sara  
Date: 28 September 2006
Author: Stephen Cree
Rating: 3.0/5 (3 votes cast)
tag Funny Poems comments 0 comments share Share favorite Add to favorites commentsSend To Friend


Rat
A rat the size of a lorry
has invaded my garden shed
should I call Rentokil to evict it
or simply ignore it instead?

Rat has tattoos on his eyelids
and teeth the size of church doors
a tail that cracks like a bull whip
and fat hairy razor-sharp claws.

Cat is on antidepressants
since rat arrived on the scene
rat bullied pussy in public
now pussy has low self-esteem.

Perhaps I should try and "befriend" rat
feign concern and pretend that I care
feed it cheese, maybe knit it a jumper
then persuade it to move on elsewhere.

I could hire a fieldmouse femme fatale
to soften him up a bit
catch rat off guard then hit him hard
when he's least expecting it.

But why resort to violence?
It never solved a thing
the answer's clear, I'm leaving here
to go live in Beijing.

Hang on though, I think it may be going...

-Stephen Cree -

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