Username Password
Register | Log in  
Submit Poems Share Poems Favorites Poems





rss feed

        
Valentine Day

Best Valentine Day

e messenger

e-messenger in now eBuddy

Wordpress Themes

Unique Themes & Templates for wordpress, download and create your own.

Stock Exchange Chat

Stock exchange community, chat room for each quote

ILoveIM

eBuddy is a web messenger application which supports MSN, Yahoo and AIM (AOL).

Self Imrovement

Videos for self improvement, self help, communication skills

Ajax Projects

Ajax Toolkits, Projects, Libraries and Frameworks for all technologies

how to be a good supervisor

What makes a good supervisor? There are a number of qualities and characteristics which indicate a good supervisor.

Facebook Applications

Do you want to know the latest facebook applications?

Egyptian cotton household textiles

Visit Aqttan online store for famous egyptian cotton home textile products.





Codgering



Old men have daily schedules, too! ,




















Submited By : sara  
Date: 28 September 2006
Author: Darby O'Grady
Rating: 3.4/5 (13 votes cast)
tag Funny Poems comments 0 comments share Share favorite Add to favorites commentsSend To Friend


Codgering
I wake up each morning, scratch my ass and head,
Then read the day's obits to see if I'm dead,
And seeing I'm not I get up for a piddle,
Then crawl back in bed where I diddle a little.

At six I make coffee and drink it down black,
And eat me some toast, without teeth I just smack.
I turn on the TV, tune in to 'Today'
And watch that cute Katie, she'd make a great lay.

I watch for a while till I drop off and doze,
Then wake with a start and go put on my clothes.
If it is not raining I go for a walk
And have me a good time just hearing me talk.

But if it is raining I pick up the phone
And call up my kids who have left me alone.
I find it amusing to make them feel bad
For not ever vis'ting their feeble old dad.

At lunchtime I slurp on a bowl of beef soup,
Then just before naptime I take a long poop,
But if constipation has clogged up my tract
I drink some fresh prune juice to get it unpacked.

And daily I tune to the 'Lawrence Welk Show'
To hear the best music, old tunes that I know;
Before I watch Oprah I empty my bladder,
To miss her from pissin' would be even sadder!

I have early supper then sit in the swing,
While watching the sunset I hear the birds sing;
And when it gets dark I sneak over to watch
Miss Jones through her window while squeezing my crotch.

And feeling quite happy at how the day ends,
I piss before bedtime and put on 'Depends.'
Then after I put my false teeth in a glass,
I lie on my bed and I scratch my old ass.

Within twenty seconds I fall fast asleep,
For when morning comes -- I've a schedule to keep!
-Darby O'Grady -

Related Poems

Young At Heart
Another birthday over, yet I don't feel old...
The Mirror For Him
Ever looked in the mirror and wondered who is the oldie looking back?......Good grief there's an old person looking at me!
Hugh (The Gnu)
This child's poem captures the feelings of wanting the impossible, and realization of the wonders of the actual.
The Student's Lament
Remember cutting up small animals in high school biology class? What about the kid who never wanted to do it?
Beach Pic
No, don't take my photograph!

Leave Your Comment

Name (Required)
Mail (will not be published) (required)
Website
Poems Pedia is a place where you can share poems with others, with a very easy interface that lets you to search and navigate through the several poems categories, send them to your friends, see others feedback and rate them.

  sara
  Tom Zart
  levorniastaley
  aj
  moises ortega
Latest Poems


© Copyrights Reserved Poemspedia 2006-2007, Powered by IRange